Familius

The Declaration of Independence

IN CONGRESS, July 4, 1776.

The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America,

When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.--That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, --That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.--Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.

He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.
He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them.
He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only. 
He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures. 
He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people.
He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected; whereby the Legislative powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within.
He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.
He has obstructed the Administration of Justice, by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary powers.
He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone, for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries.
He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harrass our people, and eat out their substance.
He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures.
He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil power.
He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation:
For Quartering large bodies of armed troops among us:
For protecting them, by a mock Trial, from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States:
For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world:
For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent: 
For depriving us in many cases, of the benefits of Trial by Jury:
For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences
For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies:
For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws, and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments:
For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.
He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us.
He has plundered our seas, ravaged our Coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people. 
He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation.
He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands. 
He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages, whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.

In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.

Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our Brittish brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which, would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends.

We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States; that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.

How to Break Bread

Today’s guest blog is from the Lessons From My Parents crowdsource project. We invite you to participate by clicking here: Lessons. 

My Mom taught me to love the almost-lost art of making hot, buttered home-made bread, and helped make it my most favorite food on earth.

In the act of doing so, she also taught me the Christ-like act of charitable giving:

We were a poor family, and as such, we kids were teased at school, and sometimes even beat up, in the small hick-town we lived in.

Every Saturday, Mom would bake 15 loaves of bread, and an additional loaf, which she made into delicious scones . . . our family treat for the week.

She would keep seven loaves, to help feed our family of seven, with lunches and at dinnertime. (We all loved Mom's bread. Store-bought bread never found its way into our home.)

The other eight loaves, she would give to neighborhood kids, who anxiously crowded around our kitchen door shortly before the bread came out of the oven, waiting to see who would be the lucky ones to take the gifts home with them . . . some of whom were the same kids who teased and/or beat us, during the week.

Mom wasn't partial who she gave the bread to. Everyone had their fair turn, no questions asked . . . every week. That's just the way Mom was!

Thanks, Mom, for lessons well-learned.

--C. UnevaRickman, Alabama

This is the Planet that Supports your Family

This is your planet. This is your family's planet. Take a breath and be grateful. 

Courtesy of  Tomislav Safundžić

Family Quarrels

“Family quarrels have a total bitterness unmatched by others.  Yet it sometimes happens that they also have a kind of tang, a pleasantness beneath the unpleasantness, based on the tacit understanding that this is not for keeps; that any limb you climb out on will still be there later for you to climb back.”

 —Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook

Positive Two-Year-Old Communication

After twenty years of parenting I have finally figured out the two-year-old communication problem. They are so busy being two that they don’t realize you are talking until you are halfway through your sentence. I have conducted careful experiments over the last two weeks and the scientific evidence is extremely supportive of my theory. 

Case study 1—Two-year-old is giving the phone a bath in the sink. I clearly say, “Don’t put the phone in the water.” Two-year-old says, “Put the phone in the water?” I say, “No. Don’t put the phone in the water.” She says again, “Put the phone in the water.” I walk over, get the phone, take it apart, and hope it will work tomorrow.

Case study 2—Two-year-old is shaking milk onto the floor from her Sippy Cup. With authority I say, “Don’t shake your milk. I don’t want to have to put you in the tub.” She says, “Put me in the tub?” I hand her a towel so she can finish shaking milk all over the hardwood floor and also clean as she goes. We take a bath later.

It goes on and on: “Don’t throw the sand in your sister’s hair.”

“Throw sand in sissy hair!”

“Stop throwing your food.”

“Throw my food?”

“Oh, Dear, don’t play in the flour.”

“Play in the flour.”

And two-year-olds say these things with such pride as though they have figured out the meaning of the universe.

So much for the meaning of the universe. I wish I had just figured this out sooner. All I have to do is restructure my sentences. I think in the case of two-year-olds it’s pretty safe to always holler, “STOP”.

Another solution is to be sneaky and say what you want them to do instead of asking them to stop doing the two-year-old thing. When they are giving the phone a bath try saying, “Please give Mommy the phone.” They hear, “Give Mommy the phone.” (Of course they likely will reply, “NO!”)

Though they may respond with the negative, it always works best to phrase things positively. Tell your two-year-old what you want them to do instead of what you don’t want them to do. Finally, if they are making a mess, which is most of the time, it is just best to go outside—milk in the grass is really not a problem.

Having a two-year-old is like having a blender that you don't have the top for. ~Jerry Seinfeld

—The Mater Familius

Be Who You Are

I am editing a book on how to help your family be fit by an amazing woman who competes in fifteen triathlons each year. She also participates in Iron man and Mega runs.

It is so tempting to think, WOW I want to do that. Then I have a reality check. I am the mother of nine children including two two year olds, I am a homeschooler, and I am starting a new business. Who am I today?

I do plan to run the 4th of July 5k, likely while pushing the twins. Perhaps I can bump up the degree of difficulty when the twins start pulling each other’s hair and screaming at mile two.

I am who I am. I can be inspired and work toward more as I choose.

Look for Mette Harrison’s ebook this fall and learn how to start small and work toward more as you are ready. Soon, you may be ready for a triathlon. I think I’ll stick to my 5k. Check out Mette’s training blog at http://iron-mom.tumblr.com/.

Be who you are now and love it!

--The Mater Familius

How Do We Succeed?

It Will Do For Now

When my grandfather worked on any project, his perfectionism would stretch it for eternity. I would finally say, “Grandpa, it’s good enough.”

He would pause in his work and say, “It’s never good enough, but it will do for now.”

In family relationships, our jobs are never done.

However, realizing that there are other issues to address and move forward is a strength.

Be willing to say, “It will do for now.”

Time is the quality of nature that keeps events from happening all at once. Lately it doesn’t seem to be working. —Anonymous

The Battle of Little Big Horn

On June 25, 1876, Colonel George Armstrong Custer entered a valley near southern Montana’s Little Big Horn River. Under orders from General Alfred Terry, Custer and his men were on a scouting expedition in the long Plains Indian War. One week prior, the U.S. Calvary had been repelled by approximately 1,200 Native Americans. Custer was to conduct reconnaissance and report back to General Terry.

In 1875, when gold was discovered in the Black Hills, The U.S. Government ignored its previous treaties with the Native Americas and invaded the Montana region. Incensed by the Government’s dishonesty and the long and tragic war, more than 10,000 Native Americas left their reservations in the spring of 1876 and gathered along the Little Big Horn River in defiance of the War Department. It was here that Manifest Destiny would collide with the basic desire for freedom and preservation.   

Rather than wait for reinforcements, Custer chose to enter the valley with his men. It was a hot noon day.

Inspired by the leadership of Crazy Horse and Sitting Bull, more than 3,000 Native Americans entered the valley and engaged Custer and his 200 men. Clearly overwhelmed the soldiers did their best to hold off the attack, but within a short period, Custer and all 200 men were dead. It was simultaneously the worst defeat and the greatest victory in the Plains Indian War.

Why does this matter? Avarice, dishonesty, betrayal, pride, and prejudice were the roots of this infamous day in history. Manifest Destiny created an erroneous point of view, that regardless of other people’s interests, those of the United States were paramount.

If we are to succeed as individuals, as families and as a civilized society, we much understand that integrity, trust, humility and tolerance are essential to that success. A society is only as strong as the families that create it. Consider your decisions and make sure that you are not entering your own Little Big Horn.

“If a man loses anything and goes back and looks carefully for it, he will find it.” —Sitting Bull 

Zombies and Babies

This week we proudly and happily discovered the How to be a Dad website (and it was almost too late). It's too good not to share for our Familius family.