Familius

The Worth of Friendship

An article recently circulated that friendships last, on average, around twelve years. That was hard to believe until I went through my list of who I considered friends. I realized that those I considered friends were clearly categorized by approximately a twelve-year span: grade school through high school, college and first jobs, stable career employment, time spent in first home or apartment, time spent in second home, etc.

What I realized was that our friendships are often dependent on the proximity to the people we interact with on a frequent basis.  This is logical. Friendship depends on quality and frequent interaction.

There are exceptions. I have enjoyed a tremendous friendship for the last forty years. We met in kindergarten. We have lived in different states and have gone long periods without seeing each other. How do we stay connected and stay friends? Long ago we committed that regardless of where we lived or what we were doing, we would call each other on our birthdays. We’ve kept that promise, sometimes calling 3,000 miles away while riding a subway or on a pay phone from across the Atlantic Ocean. The point is that our friendship could have lasted the first twelve years or even the next twelve but to us it was worth transcending the statistical average. There was a commitment, a specific day each year, to reconnect and strengthen the friendship.

With today’s social media interaction that can remove the person-to-person connection, take time to reconnect with those who, while not blood family, are still within that circle we like to consider our family—our friends.

“A friendship can weather most things and thrive in thin soil; but it needs a little mulch of letters and phone calls and small, silly presents every so often - just to save it from drying out completely.” —Pam Brown 

Age Discrimination?

Yesterday when we announced the new Familius.com and the ability for our community and writers across the world to engage with us in creating content for families we heard back that the author portal did not go beyond 1950 for birth year. Some wondered if we were discriminating against those older than 62.

On the contrary. We’ve fixed the error and have changed it to 1901, hoping that at least one person is 111, like Mr. Bilbo Baggins, and can offer a century’s worth of advice on family.

So, those of you 62 and older, enjoy your new found freedom with Familius. We are all ears.

“Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” —Mark Twain 

Family Traditions

Family traditions are important in that they provide family members with events to look forward to and opportunity to continue strengthening family relationships. Traditions can be significant events like annual family reunions or they can be as simple as carving pumpkins for Halloween.

The point of family traditions is to help the family spend quality time together doing wholesome activities. Whether your family is old or young, build family togetherness by picking a few traditions and sticking with them. The time spent together is worth the preparation.

“Family traditions counter alienation and confusion. They help us define who we are; they provide something steady, reliable and safe in a confusing world.” —Susan Lieberman

Are You Prepared?

We are facing a historic storm with hurricane Sandy and the two additional storms threatening to develop into a super storm this week. Millions are now without power and heat. Our basic infrastructure is compromised by forces well beyond our control. 

However, you and your family can be prepared. Familius recommends we take a moment and prepare for coming winter with the following tips from FEMA:

Before winter approaches, add the following supplies to your emergency kit:

o   Rock salt or more environmentally safe products to melt ice on walkways. Visit the Environmental Protection Agency for a complete list of recommended products.

o   Sand to improve traction.

o   Snow shovels and other snow removal equipment.

o   Sufficient heating fuel. You may become isolated in your home and regular fuel sources may be cut off. Store a good supply of dry, seasoned wood for your fireplace or wood-burning stove.

o   Adequate clothing and blankets to keep you warm.

·        Make a Family Communications Plan. Your family may not be together when disaster strikes, so it is important to know how you will contact one another, how you will get back together and what you will do in case of an emergency.

·        Listen to a NOAA Weather Radio or other local news channels for critical information from the National Weather Service (NWS). Be alert to changing weather conditions.

·        Minimize travel. If travel is necessary, keep a disaster supplies kit in your vehicle.

·        Bring pets/companion animals inside during winter weather. Move other animals or livestock to sheltered areas with non-frozen drinking water.

steve estvanik / Shutterstock.com

Familius.com: A New Way to Publish

Today we announce the beta site for the new Familius.com. We invite you to visit www.familius.com and take part in a unique and exciting way to build a community and publish content.

What’s different about this new site is that it allows you and people from across the world to create an author profile and publish content beyond the book. By establishing an author profile, Familius can authorize you as a writer or filmmaker to publish blog content, articles, videos, and even book length manuscripts.

The objective is twofold:

1.      To invite an international group of creative people to engage with us in creating and publishing content to help families be happy, and

2.      To build a community of people that help market Familius books through their own social media platforms and become a market for Familius books.

As we’ve said before, we are interested in finding writers for our readers rather than readers for our writers.

Please visit the new site and create an author profile. A brief video tutorial will be on the home page if you want to see a demonstration. We expect a few bugs and we ask you to be patient and report those to us so we can make continuous improvement to our online world.

Thank you for being part of our family. 

Be Yourself

One of the Pater’s mentors once asked him if he’d seen the fantastic picture on the other side of the door. The Pater looked and found a mirror. “See,” the mentor said, “What an intelligent, talented, and handsome picture of a man.”

Sometimes we are so busy trying to be like the people we admire that we forget we’re also admired and who we are, while always in need of polishing and improving, is a wonderful person full of infinite potential.

Look in the mirror and give yourself some credit.

“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” ―Oscar Wilde

Announcing the New Familius.com

Familius is pleased to announce that starting October 29^th our new website will be live.  This new site showcases our new and upcoming books, videos, and articles all focused on helping families be happy.

The new familius.com also allows you as a family member to create an author profile and participate in our mission by submitting and publishing content on Familius.com.

Next week a few blog posts will focus on this new site and interactive features to encourage you to be a more active member of the family and to publish your ideas with us. We are excited to explore your ideas. 

Let’s talk family!

Five Tips to Expedite Laundry

Endless piles of laundry can be tamed, but there is no one-size-fits-all method. Part of efficient laundry management depends on family members’ willingness to participate, so judge the following ideas on what best suits your family personality. Here are five quick tips to save time with your laundry.

1.      Do not, I repeat DO NOT wash men’s dress shirts. The couple of bucks you have to spend to send them out to be laundered and pressed is well worth it. Even when we were poor college students, it was still worth the money for the time savings.

2.      If there is an option when shopping, do not buy any article of clothing that requires ironing. I have lived happily (and stylishly, I might add) for twenty years without a single piece of clothing that requires me to break out the iron. Unless you enjoy ironing, kiss it goodbye. My iron lives in my sewing room, because that’s the only place I use it.  In the same vein, try to avoid dry clean only and hand-wash only articles of clothing. Wash and wear is the way to go!

3.      Store laundry to go to the dry cleaner’s in a bag in the coat closet, so it’s easy to grab on your way out when you are headed out for errands.

4.      Teach older kids and teens to treat stains before putting their clothes in the laundry. A little pre-treatment will save time on laundry day and keep clothes looking new longer.

5.      To avoid extra loads of towels, provide each family member with one towel. When my teenagers had free access to clean towels, they typically left wet towels on the bathroom or bedroom floor, and then helped themselves to a new towel any time. By providing only one towel (I hid extras in a plastic, under-the-bed container), they were motivated to remember to hang their towels after showering.

From The Organized Mom by Laura Torres, publishing November 1 from Familius

An Ounce of Prevention

A few days ago, one of the twin girls got into the Mater’s makeup. She plastered lipstick and mascara over her entire face and hands. She had obviously watched her mother carefully and was not coordinated enough to add it to her eyes and lips only.

After cleaning her up and putting the makeup away where she couldn’t reach it, she found her mother’s purse and repeated the process with the lipstick found there. Again, we cleaned her up and put the makeup where she couldn’t reach it.

Two lessons here: First, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Second, everyone watches your example and will model it. Be careful what example you set.

“Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion. I myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning up to do afterward.” —Kurt Vonnegut 

Lance Armstrong vs. Tiger Woods

Yesterday the International Cycling Union officially stripped seven-time Tour de France winner Lance Armstrong of his titles and also banned him for life. Nike’s response last week, previous to the UCI announcement but after the published report by the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency, was to drop their endorsement contracts stating Armstrong, “misled us for a decade” and could not “condone the use of illegal performance-enhancing drugs”.

What’s ironic is that Nike’s response to Armstrong’s dishonesty was to fire him while their response to Tiger Wood’s embarrassing infidelity and dishonesty was to stand by him while publicly reprimanding him through a unique ad created using his late father’s voice asking Tiger, “Did you learn anything?”

The obvious irony is that Nike’s golf business is over $650 million while its revenue generated by cycling footwear and apparel was insignificant. Further, while Armstrong’s blatant disregard for international cycling rules and the competitive code of conduct required by all athletes is inexcusable, his charitable work with his Livestrong foundation is at least is a bastion of good in an otherwise ridiculous deification of both athletes.

Perhaps the unintended message is that doping to gain a competitive edge is illegal and dishonest while infidelity is disapproved but marginally acceptable provided the return is risk the reward. In Nike’s case $650 million was worth the public relations risk. Hence, the Nike ad.

Familius contends that cheating is cheating and neither the illegality of one nor the immorality of the other can refine the argument. Integrity is not a cafeteria plan. When dishonesty is chosen over integrity, sorrow and disappointment follow, always.

By choosing a life of character, particularly that of faithfulness and honesty to all of our companions and associates, the world will be a better place, our families will be happier, and we will have peace of mind through peace of conscience.

“If you do not tell the truth about yourself you cannot tell it about other people.” —Virginia Wolf